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Q: What's the difference between Alex Ferguson and God?
A: God doesn't think he's Alex Ferguson.
Q: Why can't you get a cup of tea at Old Trafford?
A: All the mugs are on the field and all the cups are at Stamford Bridge
Q. What do you call a Manchester United fan with half a brain?
A: Gifted.
Q: What would David Beckham's name be if he was a Spice Girl?
A: Waste of Spice
Q: What's the difference between a Man United fan and a broken clock?
A: Even a broken clock is right twice a day!
Alec F is visiting Highbury..Arsene W tells him that foreign footballers are more intelligent than home grown..."i
dont think so " says Alec..AW calls Denis Berkamp over "Your fathers son is not your brother who is he?" "oh
thats easy" says denis "its me"...
Next day Alec calls David b in.."tell me son,..your fathers son is not your brother who is he"? David thinks
and says" can I think about it boss and come back to you?" That night he asks Victoria the same question.."I'm
not sure" she says "phone Jaap Stam he'll know". DB phones JS and asks "thats easy he says its me"
Next day Db goes to see the boss " i've worked it out he says its Jaap Stam" "Get off you daft bugger"
says Alec "its Denis Berkamp"
Q: What's the difference between a match box and Man United?
A: Alex Ferguson doesn't complain that a matchbox has too many matches every season.
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